Depressed Fan

Well, the All Star break is upon us and seeing as how the Home Run Derby is basically an unwatchable 6–hour lovefest these days, the sports blogger has no choice but to look back on the first half during this grueling 72–hour respite.

My comrades here at the Blogs By Fans Network have handed out their awards and report cards, make sure you check them out.

Since the Yanks have spared no expense putting this team together, and money is obviously no object, I thought we’d grade this team on a financial curve. Without further adieu, here are your New York Yankees through the first 85 games:

Earning His Paycheck:

1. Alex Rodriguez (MVP)
2. Jorge Posada (Walk Year/Career Year)
3. Chien-Ming Wang (Ace of the staff, period)
4. Derek Jeter (The Captain, excelling in the three hole)

Bargains:

1. Melky Cabrera (Energizing the team)
2. Robinson Cano (Coming around at the plate, future Gold Glover)
3. Mike Myers (31 innings already, only pitched 30.2 innings last season)
4. Scott Proctor (His bonfire may have saved the season)
5. Edwar Ramirez (If given the chance, he’s going be the 8^th inning guy)
6. Phil Hughes (Worth the money for the excitement alone, future ace)
7. Miguel Cairo (UPDATE: Mrs. Depressed Fan insisted I add Cairo to this list, and I agree)

Owe Us Money:

1. Bobby Abreu (Coming on, but those first three months were just pitiful)
2. Mike Mussina (Retirement would nice)
3. Johnny Damon (Either go on the DL, or stop complaining about nagging injuries)

You Get What You Pay For:

1. Mariano Rivera (His numbers put him here, but I still say he’s got it)
2. Brian Bruney (I love his stuff, but please, for the love of God, stop walking batters)
3. Roger Clemens (Coming off back-to-back stellar starts)
4. Luis Vizcaino (Terrible numbers early, coming on strong now)
5. Ron Villone (Serviceable since his return)
6. Hideki Matsui (Occasional pop, but those weak grounders!)

You May As Well Burn the Money:

1. Carl F’ing Pavano (I hope you rot)
2. Kyle F’ing Farnsworth (ditto)
3. Kei Igawa (I have no words)

Joe Torre appears on none of these lists for a few reasons. First, he gets a loooooooooong leash from yours truly, because he brought 4 rings home. Second, he’s had a crappy hand to play from the get-go due to injuries and/or a rebuild-on-the-fly philosophy from the front office. And third, his steady hand may have turned things around recently. Let’s say his stock has been upgraded from a sell to a hold over the past week or so.

Brian Cashman, I believe, is earning his money. Kei Igawa was ill-advised, but I think that was a George move more than anything. The Sox made a splash with Dice-K, George wanted a Japanese import of his own. Clemens was a good signing, I’ll take that to my grave. Pettitte, good signing (only 2 years, which is key). Cashman has restocked the minors with impact arms, and he moved some old blood out. If he can survive the season without trading prospects for quick fixes, his plan is going to work. But enough about the future, that post comes tomorrow.

To wrap up the first half, 42–43 is in no way acceptable, but it could’ve been much worse.