F*#$ The Vikings

The kinder, gentler Depressed Fan is gone. I don't know what happened to me, maybe the lack of sleep softened my brain. Maybe the miracle of child birth gave the world a rosy glow, who knows. The important thing is that the anger is back. I woke up this morning and realized the Eagles are 2 and F*CKING 4!!! What the hell is going on?

The time for even-handed game previews has come and gone. When I first looked at the schedule I circled this one as a trap game. On the road, against a sh!tty team. It seemed like one the birds may sleepwalk through and wind up losing. Guess what, when you're 2 and F*CKING 4 there's no such thing as a trap game. Every week is a must-win.

What do the Eagles need to do to win? Stupid question. Donovan needs to pull his head out of his ass. The o-line needs to inflict some damage as they open huge holes for MVP #36, the receivers need to stop playing like a group of Pinkstons, the defense needs to get healthy (God, where are you when we need you Weapon X), and keep on keepin' on. Simple as that.

If Andy Reid has a motivational bone in his body, this team will be ready to play. They will go out there and destroy the Vikings. None of this 19-16 B.S., I'm talking about a 20-point win. I'm talking about leaving no doubt in anyone's mind that the Eagles will be a team to reckon with for the the remainder of this god-awful season.

As for the Vikings, well f 'em.

Adrian Peterson: F him and his rookie-of-the-year trophy. He's going to be pawning it to pay for hip-replacement surgery 20 years down the road (nice retirement package NFLPA)
Tavarius Jackson: F him and his 48.7 QB rating.
Antoine Winfield: F all 5'2" inches of him. Munchkin.
Bobby Wade: F him and his 19 catches to lead the team. Disgrace.
Brad Childress: F him right in his m'fing a-hole. F'ing turncoat, Benedict Arnold, traitorous MFer.
The Metrodome: F it, I can't wait for the implosion. Domes are for sissies.
Scouts.com: F them for giving the Vikings the edge at the RB position. Complete B.S.
The Original Vikings: F them for finding America and not having the common sense to colonize.

1 p.m. Sunday: Eagles @ Vikings.