The latest subject of our
Early Predictions series is SF/PF Andres Nocioni, the only player in the history of the league to successfully pull off the trifecta of toughness (pictured above): 1. Argentinian, 2. Mullet, 3. Goatee.
Ironically, I'm predicting an injury-shortened season for the world's toughest basketball player (who is currently convalescing in Argentina after injuring his ankle). I do believe Nocioni has been promised minutes, I do believe he'll get those minutes, or complain loudly that he's not getting them. Here are my predictions for his numbers, with a bit of analysis below:
- Minutes: 1,200
- Points/game: 8.1
- Rebs/game: 4.1
- Ast/game: 0.5
- Steals/game: 0.6
- Blocks/game: 0.2
- TOV/game: 1.0
- Personal Fouls/Game: 3.8
- FG%: 41%
- 3PT%: 37%
20 minutes/game, 60 games is how this breaks down for me. Nocioni's aura of toughness and the fact that he was a complete baby in Sacto when his minutes were cut will keep him on the floor probably more than he should be. I'm predicting a slight uptick in his rebound rate, due to extra minutes at the four. His shooting will continue to be horrid overall, but league-average from three. He simply doesn't have the physical skills to be a decent defender anymore, but he'll make a good show of it. His secret weapon? You guessed it, toughness.
Your thoughts in the comments, as usual.
I thought his secret weapon was flopping
In his case it's called "giving up your body." And it's an essential component of his toughness, as is grabbing guys who blow by him on the dribble.
Is grabbing them 'reggie evans' style toughness?
Only if it is This type of Reggie grab...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cv1cBN8M-9I
Collins keeps talking up competition and hard practices; maybe "the mullet" beats on Thad in practice, Battie beats on Marreese, Iggy beats on Turner and Jrue kicks Lou!s ass and we find out who deserves minutes this year. It could be the best thing for all our young guys.
Nocioni at one point was pretty solid for Chicago. He's a hustle/do everything type of player in my opinion.
Or in other words, he's a Jack-of-all-Trades, master of none. Still, he should be solid for Collins when needed. Don't let him play Man D though, for the love of God.